I'm nocturnal. I can't deny it. I've always known it. I love all-night parties. I love astronomy. At school I always did my best paper-writing while the sun was dampened and dark. Most of all, I love sleeping, which generally means that my waking hours begin in what most people would call the "Afternoon." And because of these factors, I recently found myself stuck in the most terrible sleep pattern that I can imagine.
- The average American wakes up between 7.30-9am.
- I, on the other hand, did not rise until between 1-2pm. Late; I concede.
- The average American goes to sleep between 9-11.30pm.
- I, on average, did not hit my pillow until between 4-5am.
I would normally chalk this inconsistency up to what I'll dub the "Employment Factor," (or "EF"): that other people have jobs to go to, while I am, at present, a useless carbon-based humanoid. However, I know other people that are also unemployed, or who work only in the evenings, and their bodies are programmed to somehow bounce awake in accordance with the AAS, ("Average American Schedule"). So it must be more something more.
Recently I have been trying to reprogram myself, to wind and reset my internal clock if you will, and have discovered a most peculiar phenomenon. Setting my alarm for 10.30am, and then my phone alarm for 11am, (well of course I'll ignore the first one), I have experience two different results:
- I will turn off the phone alarm, ignore the radio alarm for it's full two hour run, and wake up at 1pm feeling groggy and confused;
- I will heed the phone alarm, get up by 11.30am, be proud that I've taken control of my life, and then feel horribly tired and unfocused all day.
Whichever the result, they both end up leading to the same place. By the 6-7pm stretch, I'm feeling tired and in dire need of a nap. I ignore these urges, spend the evening yawning, and push through until whatever seems like a reasonable bedtime.
Inevitably, at this precise moment, something will occur: I will stop feeling tired. I feel energized, creative, social, etc. If I attempt to ignore this newfound energy and go to bed anyway, I will lie awake for up to 2 hours with no result. If I just go with it, (as, you will note by this post's time stamp, I have done tonight), I can work until 4am without even noticing the time. This then makes it even harder to heed my alarms the following morning, and the reprogramming fails again.
What the hell? What is going on here?
5 comments:
there's a simple answer here. and you know it. It's time to leave this old life behind and join me in a new life of power and glory, of the disciplined minds decent into the prefect madness, of 22 hours of waking. Tim, the Dymaxion is calling. It's perfect.
either that, or you obviously need a job in theater, where the show doesn't start until 8, 9, or 10 pm, doesn't finish until at least 11pm, and then there's the clean up and resetting for the next night, by which time it will be 3am. Thats just enough time to go home, have dinner, and go to bed.
don't fight it tim. everyone in my warehouse lives on the same schedule. if only you could find some cool firespinners to live with who had the same schedule. Maybe somewhere with lots of space to practice juggling, like in a warehouse. Somewhere with really cheap rent.... like oakland. If only such a place existed.
-Jordan
I'm with you on the tiredness thing. I've been trying to train myself to wake up early for this Job idea, kicking myself back to elementary school schedule of being at work by 8:30 am. Just leads to exhaustion in the afternoon and evening, and then, like you say, productive feelings at night.
Goddammit.
congratulations on being unemployed and nocturnal. Its a growing club.
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